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But The Attacker Promised To Let You Go!

I posted this morning about how one might come to terms with the extreme of self defense, which is possibly having to take someone's life.  It may be by accident or on purpose dependent on the variables of the scenario.  The comments coming in are excellent and have lead me to the following post.

So often in cases of sexual assault or any scenario involving violence, there are many times when the attacker or attackers will attempt to take someone to a secondary location or tie them up in order to achieve their ultimate goal, whether it be an assault, rape, or murder.  These are two of the scenarios where I highly recommend you do not do what they say since being taken to a secondary location or being tied up dramatically reduces one's chances of survival.  As always, I say nothing is guaranteed though and each person has to make their own decision based on what they believe is best for their survival whether that be compliance or not.

Now, there are many things to be discussed on that alone, but I wanted to address a commonly used phrase by many attackers which may go something like, "If you do what I say, I PROMISE I will let you go".  The majority of the 13,000 clients we teach a year with SAFE International tell me that if they heard that, they would most likely comply since they were promised.  I ask why they would believe someone who has just beaten, sexually assaulted, or been physical with them?  Have they shown you they are trustworthy so far? Most tell me that they believe everyone has some good in them and that if someone promises they must mean it.

My question to readers of this blog is:  What is it about being "promised", that for many people automatically makes them believe the person?  I teach that if someone hears the word promise they should automatically be concerned and not take it at face value, but the word "promise" holds a lot of power with the attacker.  Also, do you feel it can be used back on the attacker potentially?

Thoughts and commments please?

Chris Roberts

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Friday, 18 October 2019
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